Remember that one time I decided I would start a blog? I did it. I wrote something that was incredibly difficult to share and then I got very overwhelmed with how to follow up on it. I sincerely apologize for my lack of updating. It was truly due to the fact that, until now, I had no idea how to move on from that first post. Now I think I understand how to do it...pretty much, I'm not going to try to upstage it. That first post will always and forever be the most impacting part of this story. All follow up posts are probably going to be a bit of a letdown after that first story, but I've accepted that. Nothing can compare to God performing a miracle and I'm certainly not going to try.
We are officially at 25 weeks and the baby seems as healthy as she could be. Yes, that's right...she. It's a girl! We found that out weeks ago, but I didn't think to share the news via facebook or anything. I am genuinely terrible at communication, which is another reason starting a blog was a huge stretch for me. These days, baby girl is wiggling, kicking, and jumping all over the place. It's gotten to the point now where she wakes me from a sound sleep in the middle of the night. I look at it as a tiny preparation for the wakeful times to come as a new mommy. My favorite past time right now is to watch her little movements pop and poke my belly all over the place. It's very strange but incredibly awe-inspiring to see how strong she's getting and how big she's growing!
I can safely say that nearly all of my fears about this pregnancy have dissipated. Up until about 20 weeks I still struggled endlessly with fear about losing the baby and something going terribly wrong with her development. Of course, God quickly proved me wrong every step of the way. It seemed that right when I became convinced something was wrong, God would prompt the baby to do something to show me how silly it was to worry. My favorite example of this came during our 20 week ultrasound. At that point, I still hadn't felt the baby kick and was fearful that she wasn't moving and she was weak. This fear was immediately alleviated when the ultrasound tech showed us our baby girl. She was wriggling and moving like crazy during the whole exam and, of course, all looked perfect with her development. I am so thankful to have a God who is so patient with my doubting heart. It's amazing how, even when God chooses to show up in such a big way, I can still convince myself that I should worry about the outcome. I definitely don't deserve this incredible blessing, but I am so humbled and thankful to have received it.
Lately, I've been working on praying for baby girl as she's growing and developing. I obviously pray for her safe delivery; however, I also pray for her to be a strong believer who can share her journey of life with people to bring them to Christ. This child already has such a powerful testimony in the womb! I can't wait to see the amazing person God has created her to be.
